In Dire Time of Sprirtual Need

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AlloTalon
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In Dire Time of Sprirtual Need

Post by AlloTalon » October 12th, 2018, 11:44 am

(This prayer was posted on Discord as well)

I need prayer for my life right now. My life has taken an unpleasant turn. I can no longer talk to a close friend of mine until I change my life. here's something I learned from scripture this morning: Matthew 5:25-26
25 Come to terms quickly with your accusor while you are going with him to court, lest your accusor hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the gaurd, and you be put to prison. 26 Truly, I say to you, you will never get out until you have paid the last penny.

(What I'm saying here is metaphorical, please don't take literally)
These two verses really opened my eyes and my reality kicked in and I'm in the same situation that these verses talk about. I should've come to terms quickly with my close friend but my friend handed me to the judge and the judge to the guard and I was put to PRISON. Now I can never leave until I pay every LAST penny. Meaning I can't leave until I can fix myself.

I'm currently in a therapy program that will help me with all my emotional issues. It's Called Candeo Healthy Sexuality Link here:http://candeobehaviorchange.com/healthy-sexuality/. It doesn't just deal with Sexual issues. It deals with all sorts of emotional issues. Mine included. I'm also reading scripture more and actually spending time with God. I was so lazy about this before and I paid the price for it.

So please pray for me. I'm being as confident and positive as I can in this struggle. My close friend did the right thing cutting ties with me. But that's not gonna stop me from making my progress. I understand that I will never truly be complete because I'm human. We're all still growing.

And don't just pray for me, pray for all the people who are going through the natural disaster that is "Florance." Pray for those that are struggling in even worse situations than mine. Pray for those in CC that have stressful lives.
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Proverbs 12:10 "Whoever is righteous has regard for the life of his beast, but the mercy of the wicked is cruel."

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NeoJabez
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Re: In Dire Time of Sprirtual Need

Post by NeoJabez » October 12th, 2018, 3:39 pm

Allo,

Please read through this as unemotionally as possible. I don't want to hurt you or complicate things for you in such a way that you think you are being attacked. That is NOT my intention. I am hoping that I might teach you something, and in a logical and thoughtful manner.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________


I find a few things wrong with the above post.
  • You are asking for prayer (which is an external plea to others to share in your hopes and pleas for an intercession in your situation by the Creator and God of Love) to help you in an area of your life in which you are entirely responsible for the events.
  • You refer to the issue between yourself and 'your friend' as if your life has 'taken an unpleasant turn' (to use your exact words). This seems (as does the preceding point) to contradict your own responsibility in the issue. The reason 'your friend' has ceased communicating with you is because they have requested certain things from you, and you either have not listened to these requests, or chose not to make changes based on these requests.
  • You have said that you can "no longer talk to a close friend of mine until I change my life." There are SEVERAL issues with this statement:
    • If I am not mistaken, this friend did not say "until" about anything. This person cut off all communication, period. There isn't any chance of regaining that communication, as far as I know. (I could be mistaken.) Forgiveness and love between Christians is sacred, but just because you love someone, or forgive someone, does not mean you have to be around them or tolerate the things they do that cause you to stumble.
    • Secondly, no one has asked you to 'change your life', but rather to edit certain behaviors within it that they have directly informed you cause them stress. When people are faced with stress, they turn away from it, it's that simple. No emotional puzzles, here. Just facts. If a stove burns your hand, you learn not to touch said stove again. Pretty cut and dried.
    • Also, I am NOT a Bible Teacher, Scholar, Minister, or anything close, but...The Scripture you have cited is basically saying, in today's language: When someone takes legal issue with you, do your best to work it out among yourselves, before you are dragged into a court or hearing. Once you're in the court, and lawyers and bailiffs, and judges are taking part, it's kind of out of your hands, and you will then face THE LAW, and other people's interpretations of it, rather than just your accuser, that person you COULD have worked it out with, had you made peace with them in the beginning.
I don't fault you for asking for prayer. Not at all. I don't fault you for getting emotional therapy. Not one bit.

But I want to be clear here...You have been told by more than one individual that you need to develop healthy relationships with a number of people, and that it is unhealthy to pay so much directed attention to just one or two people. Eventually, those people will feel as though they have taken YOUR emotional burdens on themselves, besides their own, pre-existing emotional burdens.

In point of fact, you have gone through this exact type of situation IN CC before. Both times, the 'close friends' you lean so heavily upon are people who have been through their own heavy emotional stresses recently, and don't need to take on any more. I find it interesting that both of these close friends were females. I applaud both of them for trying to help, but I also applaud them for finally realizing that perhaps they are not equipped to help you.

In studying Matthew, I would direct you to Matthew 18, where, in discussing fault and disagreement between brothers in Christ, it's mentioned that these things should be handled privately and quietly at first, until or unless the offender isn't listening, and THEN you trot them out before the entire congregation.

You have not been handed over to a judge, you have not received any sentence. But if you choose to make your drama public in CC, rather than working on it privately, there is a possibility that...like Matthew 18:17 "If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.", you may be held accountable for causing strife or divisions.

Your friend, and the rest of us, simply ask that you see that focusing everything you are on one person isn't fair to that person. We ask that you see that developing real friendships can't be done if you overbear everything one-way on to another, but that friendships are, in fact, two-way transactions.

Understand that, some bridges, once burned, are burned.

In posting this prayer request, and saying some of the things you've said, you have basically deflected all personal responsibility for things away from yourself. Own your mistakes first, and then you can work on repairing relationships. You can't enjoy the use of anything broken if you keep trying to operate it without repairing it first.

I'm sure people will honor your request, and pray for you. I do. Those people you have 'offended' do. But if you make no move to change anything within yourself, or you stubbornly hold on to what causes the problems, you aren't really letting God help, are you?
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If serving is below you, leadership is beyond you. - Anonymous

Coram Deo, Soli Deo Gloria

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